I uncovered a vampire conspiracy
at the heart of the climate movement
Now streaming everywhere… streaming… in blood! Mwahaha.
The Vampire Conspiracy Lyrics
Of course climate change is a conspiracy
Made up by socialist vampires to push policies
A greener fairer world
That’s our evil plot
Free-range organic humans have the most delicious blood
We’ll build clean energy to improve air quality
Creating lots of jobs with fair pay guaranteed
A well-being revolution
That’s our evil plot
Free-range organic humans have the most delicious blood
And recycling is a lie
To make you go outside
The night you take your bins out
Is the night we bite
So now you know our plan to descale economy
Measure growth in happiness instead of GDP
Don’t try to warn the others
It’s already too late
The next blood we drink is running in your veins
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